On the Eleventh Day, He Posted

Well, I have posted for eleven days, so I'm due.

I've been feeling anxious about getting more and more responsibility with student teaching, but today I worked with a Sub all day and it went just fine. I think I'm finally getting this stuff down. I'm still scared, but I get more and more excited everyday.

I am constantly bogged down with *#$@ (stuff) to do, so I am still very stressed out. It's a good stress though. I like it and perform best under it. :)

I don't have much to say right now because I have all kinds of things you won't care about on my mind. The one thing you may care about is my friends; I am feeling very distant from some of my friends right now. It's been a while since I actually talked to Sends (call me), and Kris I just talked to a couple days ago (but he's still far away). The worst part is the friends right here at home, who I don't have enough time in the day for (unless it's with C! or Christian Awakening). I feel like I deserted them, but I know they're there for me, and I for them. This will only last a short while, and then it will be mostly back to normal. (I hope!!)

That's all for now... Stay tuned to Mikey's blog for the good discussions.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Today - It's one of those, Eh things (insert hand gesture here).

A day in the life...

Well, I'm finally getting around to adding a post to my blog. I've been very busy lately (what's new??), so I haven't been very good about reflecting here.

I've had a pretty stressful last couple of weeks and it's only going to get more stressful. I do my best, but often I feel lost and alone. I've been engaged in a long struggle with myself over beliefs, goals, and personal biases. As part of my education at good old "Tommy Tech", I have to take a series of courses on personal and social boundaries. This series culminates in a project where I must break my own boundaries and go beyond into the great wild world.

This is a struggle for any country, Catholic boy. Every comfort and luxury my parents and local society have given me promotes a sheltered existence. While this is fine for growing into adolescence, real "growing up" must be done outside these boundaries. I have certainly done a great deal of boundary exploring (El Salvador, Belize, Cru, Hospice, BETA club). But I have not necessarily broken the boundaries as far as my personal outlook is concerned. I still believe what my parents and the Church have taught me about God and Jesus, and I don't want that to change. But I feel as though I'm not being honest with myself if I don't admit that I still have biases and hold stereotypes for certain groups.

One of my biggest struggles is in religion. When I speak with a Protestant Christian about matters of faith, I can't help but put a screen over what their words with a caution sign. I am skeptical of their beliefs. I guess this is a good thing, because it shows my devotion to my own beliefs; though, I still feel guilty for not giving them a fair shake.

Furthermore, in reference to Sends' post "God takes us back" I tend to be quite outspoken in the pickier matters (as is Ris). I want to be a shining example of Christ in YOUR life; I don't think Jesus would let you just skim by unchallenged in your faith. The idea is to have a dangerous faith, where evildoers want to keep you from spreading Christs' Love. Not that I'm challenging others for this reason; I just want people to be sure they believe what they think they believe. I hope you will do the same for me.

Finally (I think), I'd like to comment that I feel that sin is conquerable, at least minimally. If you read Sends' blog and my comment you'll understand this. I don't think I did justice to my point I was trying to make regarding temptation and sin: Don't Worry!! God will provide a way, or an outlet if you trust in Him. I didn't mean to imply that I want anyone to stop praying.

~~

Tone of this post: Serious Longing, giving way to slight Frustration late in the post